At least once a week someone offers me an excuse about why he or she isn’t using the privacy settings on Facebook.
This comes after the individual kvetches about coworkers, prospective employers or relatives having Facebook accounts; I suggest the privacy settings, and people either ask me to explain how the features work, or offer me some — well, I have yet to hear a logical reason why one wouldn’t use the privacy settings.
Readers, picture me making an L out of my right thumb and index finger while saying, “Lame!” Now here are the top excuses people have for not touching the privacy settings on Facebook.
Nah!
This one doesn’t even count as an excuse. Yet highly educated, articulate people who express detailed opinions on most topics suddenly become inarticulate when asked why they don’t use the privacy settings. That’s because there’s no good reason why you shouldn’t use these features.
I don’t have time
People have an exaggerated idea about how long it takes to fiddle with the privacy settings. Then they spend hours playing CityVille, and wonder where their day went. If you have time to check Facebook updates, you can reallocate that same number of minutes to click on the upper right-hand corner of the screen and adjust your privacy.
I’m too busy
If you were really that busy you wouldn’t have had the time to open an account on Facebook in the first place. If you’re already fitting social media into your schedule, you could spend one of those sessions going through the privacy settings.
That’s too much work
How much work did you put into uploading photos to the site, filling out your profile and clicking on things you like? The amount of effort that goes into those tasks equals the “exertion” needed for the privacy settings. And let’s face it: All of this is less work than what you do on the job, right?
It sounds so complicated
Here’s what’s complicated: censoring your own profile, wall posts, status updates, photos and videos so that they don’t offend your aunt, cubicle neighbor or church acquaintance. The same goes for avoiding the site in order to steer clear of these characters. It’s much simpler to limit what these pesky people can see by using the privacy settings.
I’m going on Facebook less anyway
Really? So you’re going to let your mom, boss, or annoying neighbor keep you from something that everyone else is doing to stay in touch and get invited to events? We’ve seen what happens when people try to wean themselves off of the social network: They either come back because they’re missing out on all of the party invitations or become hermits. Don’t isolate yourself!
Have you heard these same excuses from people who aren’t using the privacy settings on Facebook? Or if you’ve heard any others we haven’t mentioned here, by all means, please share them in the comments section below.
That last excuse doesn't fly anyway since app and photo settings can still incriminate you if someone else tags you in their post.
Comment by Ramone — March 1, 2011 @ 12:09 pm
how about, "there is nothing that i put on facebook that i don't want the world to see"? I have my settings pretty wide open. I know they are there but i don't spend time thinking about it. I never change privacy settings on individual posts. Why should I? I'm friends with coworkers and my bosses. My parents, siblings, grandmother. Old friends, new friends. So yeah… whats the big deal with privacy.
Comment by sacornwell — March 1, 2011 @ 12:13 pm
You'll find out the first time you post something that your grandmother, siblings, or parents never knew about you, but you didn't realize that.
Comment by Joe Sewell — March 1, 2011 @ 12:41 pm
Yes, sometimes it's a bit of a headache, but it's worth the trouble. I've already had to deal with somebody getting upset over something I posted that, if memory serves, they misinterpreted.
I've got scads of lists that I keep around for output filtering purposes. I have one, for example, for game-related posts; the list is actually for people who don't want to read game-related posts. (Yes, posts from games are better filtered by the recipient hiding them, but if I want to post, for example, that I've gotten so fed up with Cityville's punishments for not logging back on precisely 23.5 hours after the last time that I've blocked the game, I also use that list.)
That's not including intelligent one-time privacy adjustments.
Comment by Joe Sewell — March 1, 2011 @ 12:46 pm
My online life is an open book; I keep it all public. If someone gets offended by something I posted, that is their problem, not mine. If they find out something they didn't know about me, then possibly they don't know me as well as they believed they did; perhaps they should have visited more often or even talked to me. I am rather honest and don't care what others think about me, I like who I am and wish to share myself with the world. I believe that if you want privacy, then stay off the internet. You can set all the privacy on facebook that you want, but if you visit a website that your employers might not approve and comment on that website; for example the NORML website, then those comments WILL show up in a web search on you. Life is too short to worry about who is viewing my web content; if you don't like what I post on my facebook wall, then you should know how to "unfriend" me and do so. The internet is public domain, if you have a problem with publicity, then you shouldn't be interacting anywhere on the web. I find the act of blocking someone's news feed just because they post content you don't approve of stupid, if that person is so offensive then you shouldn't have them on your friends list in the first place; and if you are concerned that it would hurt their feelings to "unfriend" them, then how do you think it would make them feel to find out that you are a fake friend in the first place. If you are utilizing "privacy" features on a social network, then obviously you do not understand the concept of "social" networking. If you would like to know more about me; then feel free to google greyeyesgabriel, I am socially accepted all over the web!
Comment by greyeyesgabriel — March 1, 2011 @ 1:11 pm
The act of compassion begins with full attention, just as rapport does. You have to really see the person. If you see the person, then naturally, empathy arises. If you tune into the other person, you feel with them. If empathy arises, and if that person is in dire need, then empathic concern can come. You want to help them, and then that begins a compassionate act. So I'd say that compassion begins with attention.
Comment by ibrahim mansour — March 1, 2011 @ 8:03 pm
I don't go on Facebook that much anyway only translates to My wall is Open to the world and Hackers and filling it with Clickjacking "Videos" which my unsuspecting friends click on because they think *I* posted them.
Trust me. I spent 4 days trying to get one of my friends back on Facebook to clean the "omg! this family died on a roller coaster!" off her wall. by the time she finally got there, she had SIX of them.
Comment by pamelajaye — March 2, 2011 @ 1:41 pm
set your Pictures of Me that other people post and then Tag me in (i forget the name) to "Only Me." Set your notifications to email you every time someone tags you in a photo. When they do, hunt them down and kill them. (I mean …untag yourself. they can't *re*tag you)
Comment by pamelajaye — March 2, 2011 @ 1:43 pm
if you post a status, your friends replies to it can also be seen by the entire internet. are your friends aware of this?
Comment by pamelajaye — March 2, 2011 @ 1:45 pm
I may not be one of your friends – but if I were, I would really appreciate that you do that!
Comment by pamelajaye — March 2, 2011 @ 1:46 pm
Well, as long as you take it upon yourself to block the games you don't want to see, that's reasonable.
Comment by Joe Sewell — March 2, 2011 @ 9:08 pm
Some people just shouldn't use a computer, or Facebook or the Internet. Your friend sounds like one of them. (I've got several of them, too. One of them even got angry with me when I suggested to her that she stop clicking those stupid links.)
Comment by Joe Sewell — March 2, 2011 @ 9:10 pm
Replies to status updates have gotten confusing lately. At one point the comments had the same privacy settings as the item to which they're attached. Now, though, a friend's comments on someone else's status update might appear in my News Feed. Since I don't have access to the original message, I have no idea if I'd be able to see it if I were that person's friend or not. But I can through our mutual friend.
Comment by Joe Sewell — March 2, 2011 @ 9:13 pm
For individual users, I think it is ok not to set the Facebook privacy as Facebook now is Changing its rule to share users' phone numbers and address with third party; while for company, who wants to have large explosure, it is good to take some work on privacy setting.
Comment by Rain Cloud — March 2, 2011 @ 9:15 pm
I agree – some people just shouldn't. This person, however, has had a blog (or two) for a couple of years and her "community" is thriving. She just didn't take the time to peek in to Facebook for a few days and minor chaos ensued. Granted, most of the chaos was all of her friends sitting on her wall, trying to figure out where the virus came from as most of us continued not clicking on it. Never did ask how she got the darn thing in the first place. Not sure how that particular one works. (wiping out the Mobile Uploads album she didn't create got rid of all of them).
But really – if you aren't going to be on Facebook often, lock your wall down and don't let third party apps access your info (not sure if even that will do it, but…)
This would consitute actually interacting with your privacy settings though.
Of course, you could do what the teenagers do and deactivate every night…
In her defense – I'm fairly sure she isn't letting it all hang out as my other friend is. The first time I encountered her profile it was "only shares some profile information with everyone. If you know Xxxxx, add her as a friend or send her a message." And actually it still is. Considering that the default settings change from last (December?) opened up the entire wall of someone I don't know but look at… she must have actually tried to get her settings right. You can only see her name, Profile pic folder, and Friend List.
My brother has a client who we are just happy that he is not on Facebook. He's… um… old. I think I worry more about the old people than the teenagers. There's a study somewhere that younger people tend to be more concerned with privacy settings.
I know of a family of three – all of them have open walls.
I'd suspect
The teenager doesn't care (he's got like 500 friends anyway)
The 20 something doesn't know the default changed
and
the mother is clueless about privacy settings.
Comment by pamelajaye — March 3, 2011 @ 3:48 am
I've heard a lot of these excuses and I just shake my head. I know there are a lot of settings and it's discouraging to some people but definitely worth it.
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