For those not aware, this is a satirical post, not actual news
Today, Facebook approved a $150 million application bailout. This comes after news of the impending shift to the new design for all users. The new design has damaged the traffic of hundreds if not thousands of applications which once thrived in the Facebook economy. The result? Many application developers are now back on the street looking for development work.
When asked for a comment Mark Zuckerberg said, “We must act quickly, otherwise the pain being felt by the developers could rapidly spread into the rest of the economy.” When Barack Obama heard the news of the proposed Facebook bailout, he decided that the issue was so important that his campaign was put on hold and he asked Friday’s Presidential debate to be postponed.
When notified of Obama’s decision, Senator John McCain replied with “Deal!” During a press conference today, Obama said, “Millions of young voters may not have access to applications that they once used on a daily basis. These Facebook users are my constituents and all my constituents have the right to bite their friends on the neck as often as they’d like. Even if they are at work!”
When asked whether giving away more than a quarter of the company’s bank account to developers was a good idea or not, Sheryl Sandberg, Chief Operating Officer at Facebook, said “Do you know how many stock options I had at Google?” While we were a bit confused by Sheryl’s response, one thing is clear: developers are ecstatic.
One top developer that preferred to speak anonymously said, “We had to switch our application name from FunWall to FunSpace, tell me who’s hurting!” That developer claimed their daily active users had dropped by more than 30 percent since Facebook started rolling out the new design. While it is unclear how this money will be distributed, we will be sure to keep you up to date with any news related to this bailout.
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Nice way to see who reads more than the title of your posts! Cute story though.
Comment by Martin Ringlein — September 25, 2008 @ 9:53 am
Kinda wish they would offer some kind of bail out for developers. We are spending a lot of resources trying to keep up with their changes.
Comment by Tom Krieglstein — September 25, 2008 @ 10:03 am
I would move "For those not aware, this is a satirical post, not actual news"to the end of the post
Comment by Frank Mashraqi — September 25, 2008 @ 11:00 am
It's a bit strange that Obama put his campaign on hold just because facebook apps are not getting enough hits
Comment by sav — September 25, 2008 @ 12:30 pm
Oh, this is not news. doh!
Comment by sav — September 25, 2008 @ 12:33 pm
A bailout is insane. You can't throw money at something that isn't working and expect it to fix it. You have to fix the system itself if you want to see any improvement. You detract from the system when you take money out of it in order to throw money at the problem.I also don't think that Facebook should bail out app developers. Sorry to get off topic.
Comment by Jonathan Kleiman — September 25, 2008 @ 12:52 pm
I hope you realize this was a joke
Comment by Nick O'Neill — September 25, 2008 @ 12:54 pm
Very cleaver. Nice post.
Comment by AppsORama — September 25, 2008 @ 1:21 pm
I almost missed the disclaimer at the top and was confused as to why this would be taken so seriously….then I noticed. Well definitely a great post… making light of the situation going on right now
Comment by Nick Stamoulis — September 25, 2008 @ 3:54 pm
Awesome.
Comment by Suli Ali — September 25, 2008 @ 6:45 pm
The only thing I am depressed about is that my tax dollars aren't going towards the Facebook $$$ bailout. I feel that I, as a taxpayer, should bear the brunt of these sort of things.
Comment by Gordon-SocialCash — September 26, 2008 @ 3:52 am
good idea for a post, wonder how you came up with it
Comment by Jason — September 26, 2008 @ 7:23 am
Nice job dropping keywords! I hope you'll report back on the spike in traffic. Thanks for the laugh.
Comment by Erik Giberti — September 26, 2008 @ 8:26 am